The Secret Emotions Holding You Back From Being Happier

When my grandma passed away I never took the time to mourn her death.

Or to truly feel the unconditional love she gave me.

For all my life, I’d felt like I’d had to earn people’s love.

Do something.

Be something.

But with her she loved me as I was.

Flaws and all.

She was patient, loving, gracious, kind, and had a great sense of humor.

And I realized I never truly allowed myself to feel the love she had for me.

When I realized this a lot of feelings came up.

Anger that I didn’t put in more effort to call her back or take the first step to spend time together.

Tears of gratitude that she loved me so deeply and laughing at some of the memories we had together traveling and how she taught me so much about spirituality and self development from a young age.

Shame that when she was in hospice, I was hoping it would “be over sooner” so I could get back to working on my business (that was my coping mechanism to not have to deal with uncomfortable emotions).

I sat and allowed myself to feel these emotions for some time.

Let the anger, gratitude, shame, love, and the human stew of emotions come to a boil, and finally cool.

I felt a release.

My vision looked brighter.

Colors were richer.

My vision was sharper.

I felt physically lighter.

I felt more love in my heart for my grandma than I ever have.

And I carry that with me forward today.

There’s been quite a few events in my life I haven’t processed yet.

And things I have.

Childhood stuff.

Being let down by authority figures and people I trusted.

And each time I sit down and look at the event, and allow myself to feel those uncomfortable emotions that I’ve been suppressing, I’m able to let go of the past and embrace the future.

It’s like your consciousness is a bunch of balloons floating through the sky horizontally.

And those balloons are tied to a bundle of rocks, pebbles, and boulders of different sizes.

As you release those rocks, pebbles, and boulders you’re able to ascend to higher levels of consciousness as your “baseline”.

Meaning...

Your base mood or emotion gets raised.

Because your body no longer is holding onto that suppressed emotion.

So it allows you to naturally elevate your default mood and feeling.

This brings about a more joyous, happy life.

One with less skepticism.

Less fear.

Less doubt.

And things look a little brighter, sharper, and more beautiful.

Genuinely.

It’s not even an expression, I’ve experienced that before.

But sometimes life events will happen to you.

Or you’ll start to go down a negative thought loop.

This adds pebbles, rocks, or boulders to your bundle of balloons.

Which weighs down your overall altitude, lowering your default emotional level.

Lowering your chances of great things happening to you (or appreciating the great things that do happen to you).

And just making life not as beautiful.

So please.

Take some time to look at some of the life events that have happened to you or that have a lot of emotional charge around them.

Pick the strongest one and sit on it.

Stew on the situation and try to force those emotions to come up.

Allow yourself to feel whatever you feel.

And allow yourself to express those feelings.

Maybe you’ll want to cry.

Maybe you’ll want to shout.

Maybe you’ll want to curl up in a ball and hate yourself.

Who knows.

Allow it all.

Don’t judge it.

And eventually because you’ve allowed these emotions to pass...

They will no longer subconsciously haunt you as much as they have in the past.

And you’ll start to notice your default mood is higher.

Bit more joy.

Bit more happiness.

Bit more positive outlook.

And life will just seem easier.

It’s been that way for me.

I pray it’ll be the same for you.

Hope this helps.

Ed

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